I’ll admit it, I’m an easily annoyed person. I get bugged by little things all the time, you know, the kind of stuff that is meaningless in the long run. These things will always irritate me, but I’m working on the level that I let them get to me (dropping the intensity from “Mother *!@###” to “Doh!”) That being said, here’s a list of things that have caused some recent rants from me.
- If you put on the packaging that the fruit is SEEDLESS, then there shouldn’t be ANY seeds at all. I’ve hit too many seeds in the seedless Clementines for it to be a random coincidence. Take “Seedless” off the package and I’ll be better prepared for those little tooth breakers.
- Who decided that it’s a good idea to put healthy food in desserts. Shove your lemon tarts and cranberry muffins where the sun don’t shine. Only exclusions to this are Apple Pies and Blueberry muffins, otherwise keep the fruit out of the junk food and give me chocolate and sugar.
- Hey delivery guy, when you stop in the middle of the road on side streets, you make it impossible to get around you and now I’m stuck waiting for you to get Aunt Millie’s signature. Pull over to the curb and then everyone can go about their business.
- While I’m at it, if you see a friend while you’re out for a drive, pullover to the curb to talk to them. I think its safer than stopping your car in the middle of the street and making them come over into the road to talk. Plus it lets the rest of us get on with our lives instead of being stuck waiting for you to get the F!@# out of the way.
- Hey Mister/Misses walker, did you know that the little piece of concrete on the other side of the curb is called a SIDEWALK. Novel idea, get out of the road and use it. That way neither of us has to give each other dirty looks when I try and pass you in my car. Would it work better for you if while you’re walking on the road, I drove my car up over the curb and onto the sidewalk to pass you?
- Are today’s cars really built with such poor sightlines that the people driving them can’t tell that they are three and a half car lengths behind the car in front of them at a stoplight. Because so many people can’t pull up to a reasonable distance, I can’t get in the turning lane and make the light. Thanks a lot. I like waiting.
- And what is it about the light changing from red to green that causes so many peoples brains to freeze? It shouldn’t take 25-30 seconds for the first car to get through the intersection after the light changes. If you’re the lead car, treat the light like a drag racing starter and tear off the line when it changes to green.
- There is an elevator that I need to use to pick up my son at his grandmothers apartment. I don’t have trouble taking the six flights of stairs, but the 4 year old isn’t quite up to it, so I'm stuck using the elevator. What drives me nuts about this elevator is the fact that I have to stop and wait for people who are using it to go down one floor. Healthy young people using the elevator for ONE FLOOR! An old person with a walker carrying two pounds of sand could walk the one flight of stairs faster than it takes to wait for the elevator to stop and restart for one floor!
- I have a food allergy, it’s not common and people tend not to believe me, but I can’t eat onions. They cause me great gastrointestinal pain and a couple of days of nausea if I eat them. But there are some people who don’t believe me, so they try and trick me by cooking with onions and telling me that it’s onion free. They’re positive that I’ll love whatever it was they cooked and that they’ll prove that I really can eat onions. I’d like to send those people a trash bag full of the vile stuff that comes out of me the next day when I feel like I’m dying.
- Ladies, what the hell is in your purse that it takes you half an hour to get your money out at the cash register? And then after all that, you can’t get out of the way because you have to pack it all back in after you’ve paid. How about this, you know you’re in line, you know you’re about to pay for something, how about you get your sh!t together and have your payment method out before it’s your turn with the cashier. Same with guys, get out your wallet before the cashier tells you the total. And leave your checks at home, checkcards have been around for years, upgrade.
And this last one isn’t really a rant and it doesn’t drive me crazy, it’s just an observation. What ever happened to putting holiday related pictures on holiday cards? I looked at all the holiday cards of people’s families doing random stuff and wondered what it had to do with the holidays. I can understand if you had a big event that happened during the year and you had a great photo from it that you wanted to use (like a wedding, or new baby, or your first time as a family in Disney), but where’s the pictures of the kids decorating the tree, or the picture of the kids with Santa, or lighting the Menorah, or celebrating whatever traditions/beliefs your family has? At least have a write-up explaining the meaning of the photo’s (we had a great year and here are some shots of the family enjoying time at the park).
Ok. I got all that out, I feel much better.
Feel free to comment and add to the list, or complain about my complaints, its good therapy!